Life can be complicated even when everything is relatively simple — you go to work, you come home, you pay the bills, spend some time with family and friends. But it is even more complicated when you are the primary caregiver for a loved one, whether it’s a parent, a spouse or a child with medical issues. Most caregivers are women, and women, as most of us know, will sacrifice their own health (it’s the ‘Everyone-Comes-Before-Me syndrome) rather than take care of themselves. It may seem selfish. It’s not. It’s practical. If you as caregiver are not OK, you can’t offer the kind of care for your loved one you want to. But sometimes figuring out what and when to do for yourself is not as easy as I’ve just made it sound.
Getting a home water massage may be more practical, depending on circumstances
OK Now What? A Caregiver’s Guide to What Matters, which won the 2016 Friendly Caregiver Award from Today’s Caregiver magazine and caregiver.com, offers practical tips not only for self-care, but since it was written by and with a longtime RN, Sue Collins, it also includes down-to-earth tips for caring for your loved one. Recommended by Marian Grant, Robert Wood Johnson Foundation Health Policy Fellow “A very readable book full of helpful advice from people with a lot of professional experience.”
I grew up sailing and building boats with my dad, married a tugboat captain, (who I'm still happily married to) and embarked on a life of adventure, challenge and fun. My first book, Woman in the Wheelhouse, told the sometimes harrowing story of working on an old coastal tugboat as cook/deckhand then worked in Mexico in the Campeche oil fields on a supply boat. I was one of the first women in the country to earn a tug operator's license. I'm the author of three other books, Course of the Waterman, which won the Fred Bonnie Prize for the novel, the historical novel, A Love Like No Other: Abigail and John Adams, A Modern Love Story, and OK Now What? A Caregiver's Guide to What Matters, which I wrote with longtime RN and hospice nurse, Sue Collins during the time my mother-in-law was moving to the end of her life.
My second, Course of the Waterman, the coming of age novel of a young Eastern Shore waterman, won the Fred Bonnie award in 2004. My third book, second novel, A Love Like No Other: Abigail and John Adams, A Modern Love Story, takes readers into the lives of the new nation's strong-willed second First Lady and her stubborn, often-absent and adored husband, John, our second US President. I wrote the book because I'd spent big chunks of time raising children alone while my husband was at sea and felt an affinity for Abigail, but also looked to her life as a MUCH bigger challenge that informed and encouraged my own. My fourth book, OK Now What? A Caregiver's Guide to What Matters (Head to Wind Publishing, 2014) was written in collaboration with Sue Collins, RN and longtime hospice nurse and has received heartwarming feedback on how helpful it's been to many caregivers.
A freelance writer for many years, I've published personal essays, features, maritime reporting and analysis, travel, garden and more for such places as The Washington Post, Yachting, House Beautiful, The Baltimore Sun, the Christian Science Monitor, Southern Living, Sailing, and more. I'm also a University of Maryland Master Gardener who grows and cans the family's fruits and vegetables, and a Bay-Wise program certifier. I write, sail, race sailboats (occasionally), walk the German Shepherd dogs, and cook for friends and family.
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Nancy Taylor Robson 